Last week I spent a couple of days in Ireland. I’ve written quite a lot about my trip already, but I wanted to touch upon it one more time, as this was the first time I travelled alone. Well, semi-alone. I have friends over in Dublin who kindly invited me to stay with them, but since I went during the week they had to go to work and I spent the days alone in the city.
Travelling alone is something that has always fascinated me. I love doing things alone, I like being able to do whatever I want for however long I want to, and not having to take anyone else’s wishes into consideration. Exploring a city that way seems like a great idea to me, I usually know beforehand what I’m going to like and were I’m going to want to spend a lot of time, or where I’d like to just take a quick glance. One of my favourite things to do abroad is visit art galleries, but for some reason I love staring at certain paintings for ridiculous lengths of time. Some just captivate me so much that I can’t stop looking, some are so well done that I want to find out what techniques were used… Yes, I’m that person that will look at a painting from the side really up close to see how the layers of paint are built up. Guards hate me. And so do the people I’m with since it takes forever.
Other paintings barely interest me at all though and those I just want to walk by, and I can get a little annoyed if I have to spend too much time in, say, the modern art section. A visit to a gallery or museum is definitely something I prefer doing alone. Oh, I also tend to pour all the information I have about a certain work, artist, style or time period onto the person I’m with, haha! Some people find it interesting but I’m sure some just listen out of politeness. Oops.
I also prefer shopping alone. I like shopping with people so they can stop me from buying something I’ll regret, but generally I like to spend more time in certain stores and less time in others. By myself I don’t mind waiting in a long queue for fitting rooms, but I don’t want to put others through that. I’m also obviously not too big of a fan of waiting while others queue up for the fitting rooms…
Something I don’t like doing alone though, is eating. I feel so awkward just sitting somewhere and eating alone. I’ll usually play with my phone or read a book then, but that doesn’t come close to the experience of having a good conversation with friends in a cafe or restaurant. Not sure if you’ve noticed, but last week I was alone in a tea room for a couple of hours, and when I finished my book I started sending out tweets every few minutes, haha! I just didn’t know what to do with myself, even though I loved being there. If I’d had someone with me there I’m sure I would’ve stayed much longer.
Another thing I don’t like, and I mean REALLY don’t like, is being alone at night. Luckily as I was staying with my friends I was spared the experience of being alone outside at night or in some hotel/hostel, but even during the day I found myself being scared every now and then. There’s something about being a young woman alone in a big foreign city that makes me feel very vulnerable and that’s not a nice feeling. Pretty quickly after I arrived I started doing everything I could to not look like a tourist and blend into the crowd so I wouldn’t be noticed, because I felt like such an easy target. I blended in very successfully if I say so myself (as long as I kept my mouth shut of course, I didn’t go so far as to try and fake a Dublin accent), but it did hold me back from doing “touristy” stuff I otherwise might have done, such as taking photos of landmarks. I’m an anxious person and I’m pretty sure I didn’t have to “blend in” so vigorously, but at the time I felt much safer doing so. I do think that’s a shame.
I also noticed that when you’re alone, you can’t really do nothing. Like actually do nothing. You have to be looking at something, or reading something or listening to something. Maybe that’s just me but I noticed that I went through everything I wanted to do and see much more quickly than I would’ve done if I were with somebody. I’d be done at one place and move on to the next and the next and the next until I’d seen and done everything I wanted to, then I’d sit down in a cafe for a while to get something to eat and drink, I’d read for a bit, and then move on again. I actually did everything I wanted to in approximately a day and a half, I think, and that was me taking my sweet time. When there’s nobody there, you can’t talk about what you’ve just seen or done, you don’t take the time to process what you’ve experienced before you move on to the next thing. Again, maybe that’s just me, but I imagine more people would experience this.
All in all, travelling alone (or almost alone) was everything I expected of it. Some parts were really great, some parts were less ideal. I’m very happy I got to see my friends in the evening, have dinner with them and sleep at their place, I’m sure my experience would have been a lot less positive if that wasn’t the case.
Will I be travelling alone again in the future? I might, but not for a longer period of time. I went for three days now and that’s a pretty ideal amount of time, I think. I do think I’d prefer travelling together with somebody and just splitting for a couple of hours every day, I’d feel much more comfortable that way.
I would love to hear your experiences with travelling alone! Have you ever done it? What was it like? And if not, would you like to travel alone one day? Or maybe semi-alone like I did? Let me know!
I traveled alone a few times in my country (Romania). I went to conferences organized in different cities and sometimes I would visit the cities alone, during breaks.
My boyfriend has gone on business trips quite often and twice I went with him, so it was similar to your situation: I would be alone during the day. The first time was actually in the Netherlands and it was a unique experience, because I didn’t visit just one location, I could hop on a train and go to some other town as well and be back by late afternoon. I visited Amersfoort one day, the the next day I went to Utrecht, some other day I went to the De Haar castle.
I also went to Vienna last month and during the week I visited the town alone.
I agree with you on being able to do whatever you want for how long you want. I’m one of those people that has to read everything when going to museums, haha. I feel like I should know the story behind something, whether it’s a work of art or an ancient artefact. Of course, this takes a long time and when I’m with other people, I usually have to go at their pace, otherwise I would be left behind.
I also try not to act too “touristy”, haha. I don’t mind eating alone, the only thing that bothers me for some reason is asking for the check, lol.
I would definitely travel alone again, I like going at my own pace and saying “That’s enough” at some point, instead of rushing to the next tourist attraction just so I can check it off a list.
A really interesting article! I can find myself in your point of view.
Last year I traveled alone a lot, as I was doing a gap year in New Zealand, France, Ireland and Wales. When confronted with an unknown city, all on your own, I think you really get to know yourself better. Before on holiday I would just follow my family or friends around, but now I could spend just as much time as I wanted in charity shops or museums, because I had absolutely nothing else to do. For personal development this can be great, as I became very independent. But I experienced that solo travel can be very lonely too if you do it for a prolonged time. After a few weeks I really missed the genuine connection that can be felt while doing stuff with friends. So I learned to make friends very quickly in new places, something I’d previously been horrible at.
In all I think that solo travel can be very rewarding, but I do see now that maybe it was a bit much for seventeen year old me. But I’ve absolutely no regrets, as I noticed that I became much more mature and able to adapt to new circumstances. Which has got me very far in the past year!
Oh sounds amazing!
I never travelled alone. Mainly I go on vacation with my parents, or more recently with my school. But I realized I often like to split from a larger group/parent while being in a city etc.
I feel as if, like you described above, I could spend my time how I want it. I love architecture and somehow I always see little “pictures/sculptures” on buildings, which for most people aren’t even noticeable on the first sight. I often found people(inc. my parents and friends) irritated by my curiosity about..well everything, and my “third eye”, which then often left me feeling uncomfortable. So tbh I really like exploring certain things (like cathedrals, museums, parts of cities…) by myself, because I do feel more free and can enjoy the stay more purely.
:)
I’m a huge fan of solo travel! I am married, but my husband doesn’t love traveling as I do–and we don’t enjoy doing the same things–so I’ve taken him out of the equation (fine with both of us!) and I’ve come to LOVE traveling alone! I have travelled alone to Sweden, Denmark, Israel, Greece, Turkey, Japan, South Korea, Argentina, Costa Rica, The Netherlands (!), Scotland, and all over the USA. I’ve found that the inherent “vulnerability” as a woman traveller alone more often brings out the good side/protective side of strangers than the dangerous/aggressive side. Something to think about! Also, you meet more people when you are not joined at the hip with another person. :)
Thank you for sharing your experience!
The first time I travelled alone was during my stay in England as an au pair. The family went of a skiing trip and left me with a lot of time on my hands, so I decided to go to Cardiff for one night, which was just really relaxing – no international travel to deal with, but still a completely new place, the first time I stayed at a hotel alone and the first time I explored a city on my own.
Second trip on my own was two years after that, when I booked a trip to London on my own – so I did choose a place I already knew quite well, and a country the language if which I knew, which I think is always a good idea for the first solo trip. I did meet friends later on who came into town for a convention, and another friend happened to be travelling throught England at the same time, so we met up and went to the Harry Potter studios together, but the first five days I spent on my own, and it was kore liberating than I would have thought possible. I was completely in charhe of what I would do, what, when and where I would eat, whether I would take the bus or walk. I loved every bit of it, but I admit that especially at the HP studios I was very happy to have someone with me. Yes, it slowed me down at some parts and at others I couldn’t spend as much time as I would have wanted to, but I had someone to discuss things with, and, equally as important, take pictures of me! When you travel on your own you only really can take selfies or photos without you in it.
Which is why when I went to D
erlin on my own this March I specifially bought a selfie stick for the trip, and was super happy with it. The trip itself again showed me how much I enjoy exploring a city by foot and just wandering around, get a snack at some point, maybe have a little impromptu picnic. Since I didn’t know anybody there I was quite afraid of ending up very lonely on the evenings – especially since I planned the trip with my significant other, who broke up with me shortly before that. However, I even managed to haul myself into a nice bar two nights in a row and stroke up conversations with complete strangers! That was pretty daunting, but definitely worth it in the end.
This July I want to visit an old friend in Stockholm – by now I feel comfortable enough to travel on my own evem to countries with languages I don’t understand a word of, and I’m actually pretty proud of that :D
It’s great that you enjoyed your trip. I understand those feelings of anxiety and it is brave to get out of your comfort zone!
I had to get used to it, but now I travel alone a lot, both for work and for holidays. Many people don’t understand, but I enjoy it because I have the feeling that I experience a landscape or a city much more intensively when I’m alone – with someone else I focus on the person too much to enjoy the surroundings. I usually travel within Europe though, where I feel pretty safe and can get by with English – there are other places I would like to go to, like Vietnam, where I would be a bit scared to go alone!
This past May I traveled through a few countries in east Europe as well as Amsterdam alone. And I have to agree it is a very freeing experience and putting a lot of focus into blending with the locals. Also have to agree with, whatever you want to get accomplished while visiting, you do because there’s no one or nothing holding you back so it’s not easy to do nothing. Out of everything it was the eating alone at restaurants which made me the most hesitant but then I thought “screw it, I want to eat here.” At first I would be on my phone or something but that would quickly end do to data cost. Then I would proceed to people watch, I love to people watch. Even then though you do feel a little self conscious. After getting use to being alone though, I did find starting up conversations with people to be a lot simpler and so feeling awkward when at a cafe or restaurant isn’t so big. I did find being a young woman traveling alone that other people are more welcoming and giving, at least in my experience. Everyone I came into contact with, even for a second, we’re so friendly.
But I would for sure travel alone again. It was a great learning experience about other people as well as yourself.
I traveled alone to Ireland for 16 days two summers ago. It was one of the most free, spiritual and independent experiences I have had. I went on a bus trip and I was somewhere different everyday. I spend almost every night in a different hotel and before going to bed I knew nothing about what was going to happen the next day, except for the locations that we would visit. It was very adventurious and I felt so free. I would 100% do it again =)